Morning Clouds on Fernan Lake – Photo by Michael Clark
Both Sides Now
by Joni Mitchell
Rows and flows of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons everywhere
I’ve looked at clouds that way
But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on everyone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
I’ve looked at clouds from both sides now
From up and down and still somehow
It’s cloud’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know clouds at all
(…)
But now old friends they’re acting strange
They shake their heads, they say I’ve changed
Well something’s lost, but something’s gained
In living every day.
I’ve looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
It’s life’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know life at all…
Have you ever thought that if you just prayed, listened to God and obeyed, everything would go smoothly for you? That all your clouds would be “ice cream castles in the air” and so much “angel hair”? In my past I had Christian leaders I submitted to because they taught me that if I just obeyed everything they commanded, everything would turn out just fine in my life. Yet, I can look back now and see the many shipwrecked lives of those who submitted to these leaders without question. Only God is worthy of such devotion and He has given us His Spirit to lead us into all truth. The rest springs from idolatry. This is what John was warning the church about when he wrote:
I write these things to you about those who are trying to deceive you. But the anointing that you received from him abides in you, and you have no need that anyone should teach you. But as his anointing teaches you about everything, and is true, and is no lie—just as it has taught you, abide in him. (1John 2:26-27, ESV2011)
I must have put this “formula for success,” following men instead of the Spirit, over on my relationship with God along the way. But as I have grown older He has been teaching me that obedience to Him is not always a comfortable road to follow. Often our clouds in life rain and snow on us and even block the sun, leaving us in darkness at the most inopportune times.
Do you remember the story where Jesus commanded the disciples to get into a boat and go to the other side of the lake? A great storm came up while they were out in the middle, trying to obey. The wind was blowing contrary to them and making it impossible to go where Jesus told them to.
Immediately he made [constrained] the disciples get into the boat and go before him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up on the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, but the boat by this time was a long way from the land, beaten by the waves, for the wind was against them. And in the fourth watch of the night he came to them, walking on the sea. (Matt 14:22-25, ESV2011)
About this event Oswald Chamber wrote,
We tend to think that if Jesus Christ compels us to do something and we are obedient to Him, He will lead us to great success. We should never have the thought that our dreams of success are God’s purpose for us. In fact, His purpose may be exactly the opposite. We have the idea that God is leading us toward a particular end or a desired goal, but He is not. The question of whether or not we arrive at a particular goal is of little importance, and reaching it becomes merely an episode along the way. What we see as only the process of reaching a particular end, God sees as the goal itself.
What is my vision of God’s purpose for me? Whatever it may be, His purpose is for me to depend on Him and on His power now. If I can stay calm, faithful, and unconfused while in the middle of the turmoil of life, the goal of the purpose of God is being accomplished in me. God is not working toward a particular finish— His purpose is the process itself. What He desires for me is that I see “Him walking on the sea” with no shore, no success, nor goal in sight, but simply having the absolute certainty that everything is all right because I see “Him walking on the sea” (Mark 6:49). It is the process, not the outcome, that is glorifying to God. (1)
As Joni Mitchell wrote, “But now old friends they’re acting strange. They shake their heads, they say I’ve changed. Well something’s lost, but something’s gained. In living every day.” The process of His Son being worked in us is the goal as far as our Father is concerned (Hebrews 12:11), not pleasing people or even pleasing ourselves. He shows us His Son, calmly walking toward us on the raging sea of our lives, if we will just look beyond the immediate effect of the storm on our little boat. Our boat is not our salvation. Christ is! The Christian life is not all about us and our comfort zone. In fact, we must have trials and storms in our lives to get us to look to Jesus only. The goal is to get us to look beyond all the stuff of life, learn from it, and see Jesus as all that we need.
Chambers continues:
God’s purpose is to enable me to see that He can walk on the storms of my life right now. If we have a further goal in mind, we are not paying enough attention to the present time. However, if we realize that moment-by-moment obedience is the goal, then each moment as it comes is precious. (1)
The people that walked in darkness have seen a great light: they that dwell in the land of the shadow of death, upon them has the light shined. (Isa 9:2, KJ2000) “God’s goal for us is not to do, but to be.” – Dorothy Clark
(1) “My Utmost for His Highest” July 27
A Wilderness Voice 
I remember the song by Joni Mitchell.. This was a great sermon, I will also remember 🙂
God Bless~
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Thank you, Mary Ann. It is funny how God’s truth can be found even in secular music. His arm is not short that He cannot save. God bless you, too.
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A strong amen!
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Thanks, Lynn.
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YES! How very important it is that we follow Christ and not a person, no matter how much respect we may have for a fellow brother or sister. What you wrote reminded me of these verses: “Jesus said, ‘Be careful that no one misleads you, deceiving you and leading you into error. For many will come IN MY NAME saying I am the Christ and they will lead many astray.” (Matthew 24:4,5).
I believe that isn’t warning about those who are obviously false, but those who come in His name! I know that our English Bibles put in commas to read: “For many will come in My name, saying, I am the Christ, and they will lead many astray.” But since there was no punctuation in the Greek, I believe it can be read as: “For many will come in My Name saying that I am the Christ…” because we would not believe them if they stated that they themselves were Christ – that would be no deception, it would be obvious that they were false for there is only one Christ; so why would Jesus bother warning us about that? But if someone comes along in His Name, as one of His followers, saying that Jesus IS the Christ, that is far more deceptive because we agree with them on that vital point. These words of Jesus are warning us of people who will come in His Name, saying that He IS the Anointed One, and yet they will lead MANY astray.
Thanks for your words Michael, they’re always appreciated! 🙂
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I just recently learned that there was no punctuation in the original and so how we read the English translations can be so other than intended by the Spirit! The verse that you quote is a case in point! Thank you for pointing it out 🙂
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Lynette, Yes, the real danger to the truth and how we are misled is through those who use His name to sow cleverly designed lies into the gospel of Christ. The Charles Manson’s that proclaim themselves to be Christ are all too obvious a delusion and fool only a few. Remember that Satin can come to us as an angel of light and he used scripture to try and deceive Jesus.
I hope you and your family are doing well in New Zealand. Thanks again for all the work you and Mike have done on the T. Austin-Sparks website and the daily devotional, “Open Windows” which God has so often used to speak to me.
Michael
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Yes, indeed!
I have prayed for some time that God would show me the lies I have believed. Just recently, He revealed that I have believed the fairy tale of happily ever after. What is more, I WANTED to believe it, despite evidence to the contrary. It has been a source of much pain and disappointment. Angel hair (I’m thinking of the Christmas decoration made of spun glass) cuts! Thanks for re-affirming God’s revelation.
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Thanks, Louise. God is more interested in the process He puts us through as He conforms us to the image of Christ than anything we can do for Him. He spends more time unlearning us than He does teaching us doctrines. Matt. 24:4 & 5 is alive and well today. We need to tune our hearts to hear the Holy Spirit in all things.
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Reblogged this on idahodimple.
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Thanks for the reblog, Louise.
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Good Morning Michael. Thank you for this post. I believe I had mentioned to you before about my whale dream. “Love is like a cat. Do not trust the minds of human beings.” I cannot put my faith and trust in any man but in Christ alone.
I had just read this the other day on Oswald Chambers.
So good to see you. Unfortunately, I cannot seem to log into my WordPress to just “like”. Verification thingy does not have my new number.
I hope all is well with you and your wife. I am back in Florida again.
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Thanks, Stacey. I hope all is well in Florida for you. Learning to put our trust in Christ alone is a big lesson to learn. HE will take us through it all. Yes, Dot and I are doing fine.
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This is an excellent and very insightful article, Michael! 👍🏻🏅🏆🏅
As I had begun reading these lyrics by Joni Mitchell this morning, I started to weep. It has been my very experience for a pretty long time now that I looked at the clouds from their dark side as well. 🌫🌧⛈ I was also tempted to believe in a ‘happily ever after’ like Louise. As I tried more and more to react to God’s moment by moment leading, I truly hoped that my life circumstances would change. Alas, rather the contrary happened and I began to ask myself what to do in order to, at least, get rid of these continued toothaches after more than one year now.
God gives you a promise and then you need to wait… and wait… and wait while things are getting worse. It seems to me that we need Christ’s faith so that we can trust God in our dark times, too. It is all about faith, not feelings, as I have seen lately.
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I too have noticed that. I depend too much on “feelings” when I have none, or feel gloomy, then I get doubtful. Yes. Faith is what is needed. In fact, it seems as though I had been agitated as of late. The world seems so very dark and whether I am happy, or sad or whatever the world still feels dark. So I am thinking we must be walking by faith and not by sight. Especially now more than ever.
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Thanks a bunch for your confirming words, dear Stacey. 🙋🏼♀️
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Thanks, Susanne. Yes, clouds come and go and some are light and fluffy and some are dark and terrorizing. Our feelings are like the clouds. We need to look beyond the clouds and know that the Son is there beyond them as well and He has promised that He will never leave nor forsake us even until the end. I am glad you found this blog post helpful, dear heart. Your input and insight is always appreciated.
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Let the wind that moves our clouds be the Holy Spirit!
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Amen, Susanne.
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I still can’t just “like” Michael and Susanne! I am so grateful to the both of you. I love your response above. And the promise of He will never leave us nor forsake us. Glory amen!!!!
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No worries about the likes, dear Stacey! ❤
Thanks for your encouraging words, my sister. 🙂
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Thank you my Dear Susanne!
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Susanne, I have read your testimony and am familiar just how Daddy has used clouds so many times to speak to you in the past. As we chatted today it was good to hear that Jesus told you that your time of enduring tooth pains would soon be over. Even dark clouds often have a silver lining. Who knows why He makes us endure pain and suffering other than it works His Son in us?
It seems that this passage fits right in with what O. C. was teaching in my quote above. Thank God there is an “afterwards.” 🙂 Yes, we need the faith OF Jesus Christ which He is working into us through trials. Nothing less will keep us.
Thanks for your encouragement, dear sister.
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You are welcome as to the encouragement, Michael. Jesus did not say when it happens, but simply, “I will heal you, I care.” That was very comforting to hear for me after so many seemingly unanswered prayers.
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“I will heal you. I care.” What a promise with His love for you! Susanne, I will keep praying for your teeth until He does.
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Dear Michael- So wonderful to see this new post! I was coming from church and even before I arrived home I began to tear up emotionally with no idea why. I opened my mail and read your post. I never saw Joni Mitchell’s song in that light before. More tears…what you shared spoke deeply into my very long going confusion as to what was going on! I still need to stop living in my ‘feelings’ realm as Susanne so aptly mentions 🙂 In the O.Chambers piece, and then reading the rest of the incident we see the disciples panicked and even thinking they were seeing a ghost when Jesus arrives – It is comforting lol since we know the end of the story. The issue for me lies in not knowing the ‘end of the story’ in the midst of the conflict because my little faith is flagging 😦 I so need to remember that in the raging storm and clouds when all I’m seeing “now they only block the sun, they rain and snow on everyone…” that I am not forgotten nor is my situation exclusive. I truly thought I was losing my mind just a few weeks back. Thank you for this wonderful encouraging post!!!
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Judi, your comment truly blessed me. It is my heart’s desire to be used to encourage His saints who are going through these hard times in their lives. Yes, dear sister, you are not alone. It was an interesting discovery from the scriptures to see how often God cloaks Himself in darkness when dealing with those He loves. It is the darkest place of all when He has us tucked under His wing… clouds.
“And it was about the sixth hour, and there was a darkness over all the earth until the ninth hour. And the sun was darkened, and the veil of the temple was rent in the midst.” (Luke 23:44-45, KJV)
It was in the darkness of the ninth hour that Jesus cried out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” Yet, it was then that our Father was tearing the temple veil and the veil of His flesh that we might all have access to Him (See Hebrews 10:19-22).
You are welcome, my sister,
Michael
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Wow! That was a God-inspired comment, Michael! Thank you very much!!! 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
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You are welcome, Susanne. Thanks for your edifying comment. You are a blessing. 👍🙂
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What an incredible picture you painted with those verses!! I must tell you that the Lord has been so kind to continually confirm that I am not alone. Your saying it in your reply is very meaningful to me. It has been like a theme for some time now but the reason for the darkness had not ‘dawned’ on me that He could have me covered under His wings so I hope that is true. The Spirit gave me a song long ago and the chorus goes like this: ” Gather us, gather us under Your wings, like mother hen her young chicks she brings, Till danger’s past and fears subside, Hide us dear Father our El Shaddai” It came during another dark time when I really needed to know that I was covered…thank you Michael for this port in the storm…and to all the saints in this fellow-SHIP! Hahaha!
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Judi, you are welcome. Here are some verses that speak of God being in our darkness and His faithfulness to the end…
These verses meant a lot to me when I was going through dark times in the past, and I hope that He speaks to your heart through them as well.
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A good word at an opportune time, Michael. Thanks.
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I am glad to hear this, Allan. Good to hear from you.
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Yes we must keep our GAZE on Christ–Not on the boat or the storms–Great word Mike!
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Thanks, Ken. Good to hear from you again.
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I am going to share this on FB, in several places. It is an excellent article and blesses me to read of others who are experiencing that which I too have come to understand through my walk with the Holy Spirit … in the Spirit, since 1978 I received this revelation in 1989, when I was called to a season of deeper consecration and sanctification to become Holy as He is Holy, according to Father’s unfolding plan for my life. I went through a long season of being alone in the Spirit away from the fellowship of most of those who I considered to be the Corporate Body of Christ, experiencing the Baptism of the Holy Spirit with Fire in unexpected ways. Father gave me a vision of what He was going to be doing with His Church in 1990 and I have seen it coming to pass, while experiencing it as ‘the Bride’, in my own walk. I wrote about it as one of the Chapters in our FREE online Book I mentioned to you in my letter, I sent before reading this. The Testimony of how HE brought it about and the links to it are in my Blog link for those who may be reading this comment. IF it witnesses to any of you, please consider sharing it before Him and or aspects of it freely, for freely we have received and freely we are Called to give it away, Jesus Christ being the author and perfecter of our Faith.
Not being raised in a Religious Environment and having heard Father tell me to let go of my Vision (an assumption) to receive His Vision for my life, I was empowered to go through this ‘dark night of my soul and spiritual senses’ with inner peace ‘deep within’, even during my times of struggles and doubt in my head, (but not heart). Father said the greatest act of worship is not singing songs of adoration but to trust Him completely with my life and the life of those He cares about more deeply than we can even begin to conceptualize. He wanted to give me eyes to see through His Eyes of Eternity, I was to let go of the entire unredeemed nature to receive His Holy Nature in greater fullness during this process. Jesus reminded me we died with Him to be raised with Him as Fathers eternal purpose and Call on our lives is to be Holy as He is Holy.
Blessings to you and your wife… bren
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Bren, I read parts of your book and your testimony chapter “Enter into the City of Truth” where you spoke of your dark night period and the journey you have been on. I am not sure that I was empowered to do anything during my 14 years in His wilderness but survive. He reminded me at the end that that which falls into the ground and dies is not the same thing that springs forth.
I like the format of the book where you and Curtis have included others and their own stories as well. I will not have time to read the whole book, but I am glad that you are making it available for free. As Jesus said, “Freely you have received, freely give.” Or as Peter warned of these days,
Your comment about being required to let go of your vision was good. That is what Father requires of us if we are to go on with Him. I once had a pastor that actually said from the pulpit, “If you can’t get behind my vision for this church then go find a pastor who’s vision you CAN get behind.” What is wrong with this picture!? He eventually was forced to step down. What about the vision of the Lord for His Church? Jesus said that HE would build His Church, not men. So many who claim to be leaders in the Church these days are building their own kingdoms and legacy.
Thanks for posting my latest blog on Facebook. Your brother in Christ,
Michael
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There is a bill board I pass occasionally that says TRUE CHRISTIANS OBEY THE TEACHINGS OF JESUS. I am not comfortable with that seemingly perfect statement because it implies you can do something now that might in reality take time for you to be able to grow into. Babies may want to drive cars but can not. I like this portion of Chamber’s writings because it implies process. Why constrain the disciples to waste their time using a boat if walking on the water is faster? I believe our obedience comes in layers with growth and time. Our failing diligence and strength to row a boat may look like perfect obedience, but may only be a superficial first layer of obedience to prepare us for a deeper reality of obedience.
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“Why constrain the disciples to waste their time using a boat if walking on the water is faster?” I’m not sure if that sentence was meant to be humorous but it sure got a chuckle out of me 🙂 I do not mean to take away from the good questions that you ask and observations that you made in your comment. Bless you!
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Thanks Alan. This was a good observation. When obeying the teachings of Jesus is nothing more a New Testament attempt at law keeping by the power of the flesh it will be no more successful than the Jews were at keeping the Old Covenant laws. We must be born of the Spirit of Christ and empowered by Him to obey the will of the Father or we will be forever caught in that maelstrom of Romans chapter seven. The answer is at the end of that chapter, “I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord.” He is growing us up into full sons and daughters of the Father not by our might nor power, but by His Spirit working in us.
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Hi Michael,
This writing is speaking directly to me! I have had a crazy month, a minor health scare but I am fine. What I realized through that experience was my lack of faith and not looking to Jesus only for my help.
When I was first born from above I thought the same thing that great success was ahead in my life. I Know without a doubt that I was obedient, yet the bottom fell out. I thought God was punishing me or I misunderstood what he said. Now I see that because of the trials I have grown closer to Jesus and He is not done with me. A glorious process is still taking place in me. My marriage must be the hardest ever but because of it I have grown spiritually and the joy of the Lord is my strength. My trials on the job and the persecutions I face daily are all about me learning to trust in Jesus Only!
Jesus wants us to look beyond our troubles and have faith that He can handle ALL of it. We are not to look at the raging sea and waves but look only to Him. It is so simple but hard for me. I had the dream of the perfect family and “career”. God tore that dream to shreds. But now I am grateful He did. What I share with Him I could never find in the world because it is Divine food and drink. The true success comes when we have faith that He is Able to provide everything we need. That He is for us not against us. I am a Slow learner!
Thank you Michael for this insightful post and it was wonderful to hear from you!
Wanda
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Dear Wanda, Your comment is filled with words of true faith… faith that is not dependent on sight or feelings. I can feel the love for Jesus and His hand on you in your words. Yes, believing that HE can see us through to His Father’s end for us no matter what the world throws at us because He loves us, that is the key. We must keep our hearts focused on Jesus.
Here is a clip from the movie, “Patch Adams” that spoke to me along this line years ago,
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=patch+adams+how+many+fingers+do+you+see&view=detail&mid=E47541A5588ACA10A0C2E47541A5588ACA10A0C2&FORM=VIRE
Patch and Arthur were patients in a mental hospital in this scene. I can see God dealing with us much he same way, but we will learn a lot from Him that will change our lives if we humble ourselves, look beyond our problems and focus on Him.
Thanks for sharing your heart with us, dear sister.
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Oh, Michael. You touched a deep chord with this post. A lifetime has passed since I first heard that Joni Mitchell song. I am convinced we rarely have an accurate perspective on our lives. God, however, sees our days from first to last. With His help, our arrow will strike its mark whatever the odds against that.
With love,
A.
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Dear Anna, I agree. God’s ways are not our ways (that we would choose for our lives). And His thoughts for us are not our thoughts, Thank God! We look at the temporal and the short term things that are going on in our lives and He is looking at the goal, knowing our end from the beginning (Christ in us, the hope of glory). Yes, Anna, with His help we shall arrive at the goal that is set before us by Him.
He knows our end from the beginning and His plans for us are for good and not for evil. Even our suffering on this earth has a Godly purpose by His life changing power.
Love you too, my sister,
Michael
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Thank you for the post.
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You are welcome, Pat. I hope you two are doing well.
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Reminds me of John 17:3. “This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.”
Thanks for the writing. It is spot on. Just to see him.
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You are welcome, Russ. Good to hear from you again. To KNOW our Father, the only true God… To think that this is what eternal life is! It is so much more than sitting on a pink cloud, playing our harps as is so often portrayed. This very God who created all things and who said, “My ways are not your ways and my thoughts are not your thoughts.” Wow! What a change, what a miracle He has to work in us that we might really KNOW Him as He is!
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[…] had some thoughts rattling around my mind for the last week or two, and then I saw this great post from Michael Clark. He provides insight into a problem I’ve faced and which I think many […]
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